To name and to shame?

I have little time and less respect for lazy recruitment agencies.

That is largely because I used to run a recruitment programme for a deliver centre within a global company and I know how much agencies get paid for a successful candidate.

At the time, I got tired of the mountain of CVs that indolent recruitment agencies were piling on my desk, 90% of which were not remotely suitable for the roles. So I completely changed the process (I’ll spare you the details*) and invested some time in visiting the recruitment agencies to explain how being less lazy early in the process was actually going to save them effort in the long-run and be more profitable, which it was.

Many years have passed since then, but many agencies continue to be shiftlessly relying on the key-word search and despite my profile clearly stating that I am a Senior Business Analyst, agencies keep contacting me to ask if I would be interested roles on PRPC projects as a developer or as a technical consultant (because the magic letters “Pega” and “PRPC” appear in my CV).

A recent exchange on the phone went something like this:

Agent: Declan, I found your profile online and I was wondering if you would be interested in a role on a PRPC project. Our client has roles in [location #1] and [location #2]. Which location would interest you more?
Me: Well, it would depend on the nature of the role, really.
Agent: Our client is looking for a [technical solutions role #1] and a [technical solutions role #2].
Me: I am a Senior BA and while I do have full systems lifecycle experience, I am not a technical solutions consultant.
Agent: But would you be interested?
Me: Have you actually read my profile? I am not suitable for either of those roles.
Agent: Can I put your CV forward to the client anyway?
Me: Have you read my CV?
Agent: No.
Me: Please read my CV and call me back if you are still interested.
Agent: May I connect with you on LinkedIn so that I can get access to your contacts?

The problem with agencies like this is that they do not just waste my time, they also waste the time and money of their clients (my potential clients) by sending them unsuitable candidates. I don’t just look after the interests of my actual clients: I also take care of the interests of my potential clients by eliminating myself from the hiring process early on. In other words, I do the agency’s job for them.

But I think we need a website which names and shames lazy agencies. That way, hiring companies can get a sense of which agencies to avoid and candidates will know to hang up the phone as soon as they hear: “Hello, I’m calling from Lazy Gobsheens PLC…”

Kind regards,

Declan Chellar

PS: Don’t forget to read the next bit.

* Unless you want to hire me to streamline your recruitment process, increase the effort of the agencies, eliminate unsuitable CVs from the process, minimise the impact on the time of the hiring managers and interviewers and increase the success rate of interviews to about 60%, thereby saving your organisation enough money to bail out an irresponsible banker.